Writing About Writing

There are several interviews with Laurie Halse Anderson, both online and in the back of the book Speak. They both really give a lot of insight into her writing, and it makes me appreciate the book a little bit more.

She never admits to having a tremendous experience like Melinda's, and in fact says that Melinda was a "voice from a dream". She does talk about her freshman year in high school, which kind of resembled Melinda's. She moved the summer before high school and started ninth grade without knowing anyone. Melinda's struggle to find herself and her identity was basically mirrored off of Laurie's experiences. They gave her a "useful perspective on the absurdities of high school culture".

She also had a few experiences from her childhood that she incorporated into her book like being the obnoxious kid in English, making toxic stews with her father, and having a school with a Hornet mascot. It's clear that she's drawing from past experience, and is able to connect directly with teenagers. She says that she spent a lot of her teen years searching for books with characters that struggled with the same problems that haunted her, but she just couldn't find them, so she decided to write them. She even takes time out to visit places like the mall and Taco Bell to simply hear how and what teenagers talk about. She tries to get inside their minds to "figure out what causes them joy and what causes them pain, then looking inside for the stories I can write that might speak to them."

Her interview really shows the real person, and I think it relates to her character. Obviously her character jumps out of the book and relates to the reader. It was successful enough to even make a movie from. It's funny, because she started writing in a closet, and you can even see that echoed into the book. I like her style of writing, and I like that she tries to be relatable, and that she wants young kids to pick up the book and realize that they aren't alone. I feel that that's the important aspect of this book. That life shouldn't be walked through alone. It should be full of support, and love, and outlets to both.

How do they expect me to find myself among all this chaos? Pressure from my parents, from teachers, from everyone! If they only knew. And yet they can't even make up their mind about our stupid school mascot. From the Trojans, to the Blue Devils, to the Wombats, to the Hornets. This whole town is just one big mess, and I'm right in the middle of it without even being acknowledged. I am just a nobody. A face. A face with chapped bitten lips.

I am my tree. Mr. Freeman has to have some idea. I am reaching so hard though. Looking to the sky. If only that one sick limb would just fall off. It's gotta fall off. I won't let it kill me. I can fight it, I can save myself. It's just something that happened, that I have to deal with. Every inch of me wants to fly and get out. I will get out.

I am myself already. I have an identity. IT didn't take it away from me. That should just make me stronger. No Heather, I don't want to join every group that your joining! No, I don't want to be a Martha. I want to be a Melinda. And I want to be okay with that. Just because I'm scarred, shouldn't make me less of a person. It shouldn't make me a nobody.

What is the main theme of this story? There are reviews that state that it is about rape, or simply about a teenager in high school, but what is the real underlying theme? I disagree with both these reviews. Yes, this girl is going through a lot of pain and suffering because of her rape, and is struggling to stay above drowning. She even says as she looks at the turkey floating in a pot, "I feel like the Titanic". There's no doubt that this book is about her struggle, but it's more central than that. It's about communication, or lack there of.

There are so many things in this story that allude to lack of communication. She can't talk to her friends first of all, because they don't want to talk to her because of what she did. They shut her out and ignore her, and eventually they all go their seperate ways. Heather simply is the talker, and she doesnt' even listen to Melinda or ask her oppinion. She is more concerned about her status and popularity instead of anyone else.

We see a lack of connection with people, because she labels them instead of using their real names. She can't/doesn't connect with her teachers, obviously, because she makes up names for the ones she doesn't like, such as Mr. Neck, Hairwoman, and Principal Principal. They have no significance in her life, and she feels like there's no way to connect so she just blocks them out. A huge image she uses is calling the boy who raped her "IT", instead of Andy. Nicknames in this easily allude to a disconnection.

There are little crosshairs throughout the book that illustrate miscommunication as well, such as the fight between Mr. Neck and David Petrakis. Mr. Neck made the mistake of bringing up a personal, racist issue in his classroom, and it blew up in his face. And instead of admitting that he was wrong, he just cut off the conversation when it started to take a turn for the worst. He didn't want to hear what the students had to say.

The only exception to the rule is Mr. Freeman. Ironically, we can look at his name: Free man. He paints pictures of what he thinks about the school counsel, and he voices his opinion constantly about his lack of supplies and support, (not unlike most art and music teachers). He does what he wants, and interestingly enough, he is the one teacher that gets through to Melinda, and helps her open up.

To me, communication is the real issue in this book. We need to let students know that there are outlets, and that they can go somewhere if they need to. The whole situation was based off of no communication, simply because she called the cops and didn't let them know what happened. I found an interesting outlet hotline that I think students would never even imagine calling unless they knew about it.

In a section titled "Peeled and Cored", Melinda finds herself in the biology room with her lab partner David, about to disect an apple. To me, this entire section sums up the book. I've read the book before, so I know how it's going to end; however, it's not only foreshadowing, but a metaphor into her character. The fact that the biology class starts out with talking about reproduction with apple trees makes me think that it's forshadowing. The tree is just such a strong piece in the book, and Melinda is connected to it so many times, through this class and through her art class. The fact that the boys take sex as a joke to be laughed at makes a good statement of what may reveal itself.

The fact that the apple reminds her of when she was little, sitting in apple trees, in an orchard gives a little background information along with insight that maybe she is connected to this apple. It pulls her back to her childhood, when everything was healthy in her parents' relationship. And when she was happy, sitting in trees with the sunshine on her hair, and the bees buzzing around her head without want to sting her. It's a beautiful image disrupted by the disapproval she gets from her lab partner when she's told to cut it correctly. The image is popped with the blade of her disecting knife. And then the real metaphor begins with the image of the germinated apple seed inside the apple. It is an image of life, and hope. As Melinda puts it, " An apple tree growing from an apple seed growing in an apple". That germinated seed is a symbol for Melinda, like the tree. There is hope somewhere inside of her, and there is something that is growing, but technically the outer part is dead, or will be dead soon. Melinda isn't dead completely on the inside. She still strives for something good to come of her life. She still wants to get through life, just as the seed wants to see life. It's always a struggle. It is and it always will be. That seed will grow, just like Melinda is learning to grow through the pain and suffering. She may look dead on the outside, but she's still alive on the inside.

Ok, I'm going to start from the end of the conference and work my way backwards. I'm not sure why, but I just have this urge. I think maybe it goes from the one that made me think most of all to the one that was less but still very interesting.

The last break out session I attended was my favorite because it convinced me that I didn't want to be a teacher. It was a bunch of interns talking about how they enjoyed their experience in the field, and what it was like, and I realized that it definately wasn't for me. I'm not saying that this suddenly changed my mind, but I think it helped to make my decision. But it was a great session. They had so many handouts, and so many resources that it really enriched my experience. I really got to look into what teaching was going to be like, and what interning would be like, what to expect, and what to be brutally prepared for. It opened my eyes.

One of the middle conferences that I attended had to do with applying technology to a school setting; however, it wasn't the spiffy one that everyone was raving about. It was an intern sharing her current experiences with everyone. She incorporated music into her history lesson. And also modern day occurances to get them to relate. The thing that really woke me up in this presentation though was a point that she made about cirriculum. She said that when you're teaching something, you might have to skip the bare facts, and go with the general idea. She was teaching the constitution, and she basically skimmed to the right of life and speech. That just seems like cheating to me. But you have to make your lessons relatable, so in the end, I guess it does make sense. It'll help the students to learn, and help them enjoy what they are learning.

A part of me wants to write about the keyntoe speaker, and his rant about incorporating technology into the classroom, but I think it's an overworked topic now, concidering that we've been learning from the GVSU king all semester. I think as future teachers, our generation is only inclined to incorporate technology into their teaching practices. Or maybe it's just me. But I think as enthusiastic teachers, we are going to want to relate to our students, so what exactly is going to get them excited about what they are learning? Definately not general lectures, reading, and writing. Students need things from their daily life to actually make them wake up from their educational fog. We need to give them something worthwhile and make them enjoy coming to school. Otherwise our jobs are going to be just as dull. I'm not saying you need to have a trick up your sleeve every single day, but enthusiasm isn't going to be the only thing that will motivate the students. They need to know that you care, and that you are wanting them to relate it to their lives. It's enthusiasm through relatability and technology.